T – 7 [+5]

yurbt7w0bv

I feel that now I’ve gone through more ‘clinically’ what I’m planning on doing, I can now use this space to reflect more on how I feel, both right now and about the challenge in general.

Originally I started to write this post about a week before I started, and added notes here and there as time went on. But I seem to have picked the busiest part of my September to start this, so my original intentions of posting before the start date, on the start date and then several days later have culminated into me just posting once several days late. But I do think it’s a good idea to look at where I was mentally before this started, so we’re going back in time for the rest of this post..

A [not so] long, long time ago…

I need to do this challenge. I definitely have an overeating problem. Monday night [the 19th] I felt so sick after dinner, and (TMI) actually threw up a bit in the back of my throat after burping at one point. I was so bloated and looked about seven months pregnant, and just hated everything about how I felt. Every meal time had been an excuse for overeating. Breakfast had been three bacon rolls and one cheese omelette roll, when normally three is even too much. Lunch was a chicken, bacon and avocado wrap with fries, the afternoon saw a pumpkin spice latte and then dinner was an entire four seasons pizza plus dessert.

So Monday night I feel awful and ill and like I have a problem, and decide that I definitely need a lighter, healthier day on Tuesday. But come Tuesday, I have a haggis roll for breakfast, a ham, pepperoni and cheese panini with fries for lunch and cake mid-afternoon. It wasn’t that any of these foods were overly appealing or that I was craving any of them, I just seemed to be on a self-sabotage track and couldn’t feel any appeal in the healthier options (of which there were many available).

I have fears and doubts about whether or not I’m going to be able to succeed in this 100 Days of Healthy challenge because I’ve never maintained consistency consistently before. The longest I’ve managed anything is four weeks when I first started T25 nearly a year ago. But the moment my routine changed, when I visited my parents for a week over the Christmas holidays, I was unable to keep it up and it eventually fell away altogether.

I think I need to get into the right mentality. My head needs to get around the idea that this is a permanent lifestyle shift rather than just a thing I’m doing for a set amount of time. I can’t think of this as a timeboxed 100 days thing – although if I think of it as a forever thing that might scare me off completely. But I’m trying to do 100 days so that it’s easier to maintain all these things for the time after that – that I just continue doing them and they’ve become habitual. Thinking of a lifestyle shift is hard though, because I enjoy my lifestyle. Well, maybe not the effects of my lifestyle, but I like the foods I eat etc. I don’t feel particularly unhealthy.

But even writing that I have to stop myself. I clearly just stated earlier that I am sick of how I feel and I don’t find the foods I’m eating particularly appealing. Maybe I enjoyed things a few months ago when everything was more moderate, and maybe I enjoy having these things as a treat, but all the time? I don’t! Otherwise I wouldn’t want to do this challenge at all!

There’s a need to try and make this so I’m not completely overwhelmed. When I’ve tried changing to a healthier lifestyle in the past I think I’ve had the tendency to go overboard and burn out. I know this is going to take more of my attention for a while because I’m doing a big overhaul and the intention is to make these things become habit, but I need to make everything as easy as I can for myself. So I’m not going to do the Blogilates challenges, for example, though I’ve always tried to add them in before – because that’s extra fussing with several different things on top of the other exercise etc. Instead I’m just going to focus on doing the exercise I have planned consistently.

So to help with the consistency, I need to figure out how I’m going to remain accountable. How can I track on a daily basis? Spreadsheet? In my planner? I want to track my workouts as I’m planning on getting back into strength training, so there’s definitely going to be a spreadsheet involved. Not sure whether I’ll make that public though – I tend to go a bit overboard on my health spreadsheets.

In general, I plan to keep track of this challenge in several different places. I want to write about it here, give updates about what I’m doing and how it’s going and how I’m feeling and if anything is changing. I want to start using tumblr again properly as I loved the community aspect and support the health and fitness community there gives each other. I vanished from any sort of personal posts for a while and let this slide so definitely need to pick back up – it was a great help last time around!

My cousin had massive success keeping track of her eating on Instagram but last time I tried this I tended to lie by omission and didn’t show the photos of the things I was less proud of, and I quickly stopped because the more I gave into unhealthy habits the less I showed and the less it worked as an accountability tool. But I’d like to have another go. I’ve been thinking about whether I should write down the food I eat each day or just tick off portions of fruit/veg etc. I don’t think I want to input everything via MFP or write down every meal as that’s very time consuming, but ticking off portions of fruit/veg and taking a quick photo to put on Instagram is probably a good way to go.

Photos would also make everything more cross-platform, which I like and am definitely trying to get better at, but it does mean I need to remember to take photos of my food. How I used to have such a big presence on a number of different internet sites/communities when I was in my teens I have no idea. I just don’t seem to have the time anymore to keep it up!

It’ll be interesting trying this in the latter part of the year because autumn/winter is usually the time when it becomes a lot harder to eat healthily and be more active because all you want is comfort food and to be inside away from bad weather.

Maybe I should book a massage every other week as ‘reward’?

**Photo credit Freddy Castro, Creative Commons CCO License**

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedintumblr