I think the main thing ‘What I Want To Work On Wednesday’s have taught me this week is how fast time can seem to move. Whilst some part of me feels that this week has moved at a decent pace and I got things done, I also can’t believe I’m writing this WIW2W post already. It feels far too soon.
Which, I suppose, is one of the reasons why I started doing this in the first place. To stop time whizzing by so quickly without taking advantage of it to its fullest. To ensure that I don’t check in a month down the line and say, oops – I’ve not really done anything.
A few days ago I was reading through my old blogs (there were at least two before this one) to both gain some inspiration on what to write about and, more importantly, see what my life was like a few years ago. It wasn’t long before starting this one that I last wrote in my previous blog – I started this one in November 2014, and the last post in my previous one was October 2014, although regular posting stopped around August – so I was surprised to discover that for the most part I feel like I’m reading about a completely different person. I was extremely surprised at how much I’ve changed and grown as a person over the past two years. As much as I tend to beat myself up a bit at the moment when I feel like I’m going off the rails (falling into bad food, sleep and exercise habits), ‘off the rails’ for me now is nothing like it was two years ago. I’m much better organised, much more confident, much more on top of my mental health – to name just a few things.
One thing I did do on my last blog which I think would be a good idea to start doing again here is the brilliantly named (and not at all overly wordy) “What I Want To Work On Wednesday”, where I’ll name a couple of small things I want to work on during the week ahead and check in on how the previous week’s tasks are going. This ties into my mention of accountability in my last post. It’s very easy for me to completely lose track of time and my goals and ambitions if nothing or nobody is checking in on me or making me stop and think about how I’m doing. That’s how – just like this last month – I can suddenly stop and realise that it’s been over three weeks since I last did any consistent exercise, despite feeling like I’d just taken a day or two off.
There’s really no correlation between this picture and this post
Surprise! I’m still alive!
So, that went well.
Despite the fact that several of the last couple of posts published on this blog discuss re-starts and a need for increased consistency in posting, you may have noticed that I’ve failed spectacularly in doing just that. Whilst I did indeed have several very good weeks following on from my last post in regards to improving my diet, exercise, sleep schedule etc… I quickly fell into the same problem that so many people have with the end of the year, when I let December and the Christmas holidays completely derail my progress.
October. Fall. It’s the start of the dying of the year, when it gets colder and darker and everything draws to an end. It is also, I have decided, a time to appreciate fresh starts – although I realise we’re currently heading into the latter part of the month. Plants are dying and turning to mulch so that new plants can grow in their place next year. Leaves fall from the trees so that those trees can survive the winter and then continue to grow, fresh and anew in the spring.
So whilst some people are starting to hunker down for the winter, their summer plans and fitness routines and optimism for the year starting to fade, I’ve decided to use the start of the season as a fresh start for myself.
This is not the post I thought I’d be writing today. I’ve got two entries that I’m currently working on in my drafts all about moving forwards and what I want to get done over the next few weeks, but for some reason I decided today to look back.
A few years ago I started writing ‘morning pages’. If you’ve never heard of them, they’re basically stream-of-consciousness pages of writing that you’re supposed to do first thing in the morning. Apparently it helps with your creativity. You can write about absolutely anything, but they often tended to be quite diary-ish on my part.
It just so happened that the notebook I picked up today contained entries from 2.5-3 years ago, when I was in my final year at university. I want to share two of those entries with you, and I then I’ll talk about them afterwards. It’s a little long, but I would ask you to please, keep going.